Im soooo stupid

Yesterday I was a little frustrated...
Because Im going to sits for my final tomorrow *means today 31 Oct 2007*...
and...
My dad havent submit my exam fees to the college yet...
I was worried that I might not be able to take the exam...
As if Im cant take this oct/nov 2007 exam, I have to postpone it to next year...
and I dont wish to do that...
I want to finish it as soon as possible...
Maybe Im going to join the Sukma Team and next year Sukma surely clashed with the exam...
I know that my dad is having difficulties...
I understand that but if he cant afford me to study college, he should tell me earlier...
So that I wont choose to go to college...
I will choose to go for form 6...
Sometimes I think Ive made a wrong decision...
I think I should go to f6 instead of college...
In f6 I have lots of friends...
Honestly, I missed the high school moments too...
Last night I was thinking of ending my life...
*How stupid am I*
With this small matter should I end my life and get a new a better life???
At last I didnt do that...
As I am too afraid to die...
I have no achievement to make my family proud yet...
I must continue with the life I have without giving up...
And my mom ask me to go for the exam...
Hope that my name is in the list...
And Ive made up my mind and face it...
Thank god!!!!!!!
I get to go for the exam...

Rain...

Its raining again... Very heavy... No mood wanna go redbox... Have to stay inside the house doing nothing besides watching tv and The Drive of Life... Finally Ive finish watching it...

See... Its raining... Sienz.. But can save electric cos its too cold and I didnt switch on the fan for the whole noon...

What do I do usually its raining :

• I will listen to the best love song *something like sad love song... kinda romantic... ><*
• I will drink a cup of hot milo
• Online. Of coz surfing or chatting
• Watch Dvd or Tv
• Sleep!!! But sometimes only as Im not used to take a nap in noon

Well, everybody please remember to bring your umbrella... *Rihanna's umbrella starts to play* Ella ella....

Apartment 1301

Its raining again....

I have to wake up at 0800 today coz I need to fetch my sis to work. She is not feeling well. Cant drive. And also I wanted to use her car. Going to watch 'Apartment 1303' with Ai Ling today at gp. Hehe!!!

Also going to find Mr Saini to ask him about the exam and our LANS subject thingy. Coz nobody inform us that we need to attend any LANS classes and we didnt even take any of the exam. Importantly, we've already make a payment last year. I wont let IPG makan my money. If possible I want a refund for the rm240. Unfortunately, we cant make any refund. And we have to attend the LANS classes right after our final. Sienz... I thought after this exam I get to rest for 1month but seems like i still have to attend the LANS classes. Haizzz...

Lets talk about the fun stuff. Apartment 1303 is quite scary with the sound effects and music, it might scares you. Ahaha!!! Nowadays the 'asian ghost' seems like murdering the human being. This time, they only killed the young girls. So we better becareful. Ahaha!!!

Well, more great movies is coming up tomorrow. Let see what interesting movie that I want to watch... There is some :

1. 1408
2. Kuntilanak 2
3. 30 Days of Night (1st Nov)
4. Shrooms

Its a smash!!!

I heard my mom was screaming to my sis that her car's window has been smashed and all pecah... I thought I was dreaming because Im sleeping like a pig this morning. Since it is just a dream, I continue to piggy. ZzZzzz...

My piggy finish at 12 something. As I open my room's door, my sis was standing in front of the door. I was shocked *she look so scary because she is damn sick and her face is kind of pale*. The way she talk to me also kind of dead.

Sis : Er jie, finally u wake up. Ive waited for so long for you to wake up. My car back window has been smashed and all pecah.

Me : Hah!!! Really ah??? No wonder I heard mami was screaming about that this morning. I thought I was dreaming. Hehe...

Sis : I heard there was a smash glasses sound and firecrackers too. Then I dont really bother to take a look and I hope that it wasnt my car. Mana tau, I kena jackpot. Its my car. Ohya, also have the motorbike's sound "vroom vroom" like that.

Me : Must be some huanakia that purposely do that. We didnt tek chui anyone also. Must be purposely. Why wanna choose our car?? Our neighbour also did parked their car outside what.

After bathing and fill my stomach with some food, I follow my sis to get the window fix. Damn the huanakia. Only the side window already cost rm90. Haizzz...

Love Is In The Air

They may forget what you say,
But they will never forget how you make them feel.

Love is just a word...
Until...
Someone comes along and gives it meaning.

Love is like an earthquake-unpredictable,
A little scary,
But when the hard part is over,
You realize how lucky you truly are.

Love is not blind,
It simply enables one to see things others fail to see.

True love burn the brigthest,
But the brightest flames leaves the deepest scars.

The one who loves you will make you weep.

I love you not because who you are,
But because of who I am when I with you.

Do not love me because I love you,
Love me for loving me.

Love is all passions the strongest,
For its attacks simultaneously the head,
The heart and the senses.

Accidentally in love...

Love is a decision, not an emotion.

.:RanNy:.

New Layout

Im having prob wit my new layout :(

Its kinda mess...

Cos there is no title for my blog, no blog archive, cant comment and no picture display....
For the previous blog 'Se7en - Come Back To Me' lyric is kinda mess up....
Actually Ive posted the song together with the lyric in the blog but it came out just the lyric only....
So, I have to post the song in 'Keep Rawkin' section...

Be patient everyone...

Im going to fix it...
Maybe with new layout...
I have couple of cool emo layouts... Hehe!!!

Se7en - Come Back To Me

COME BACK TO ME

Se7en

Yeah
Cham manhi miwosso
Noui modunge oredoen sajin soge
Nar bomyo ugo son goun no phyojongdurkaji
Ja gonamyon negero
Doraor gorago jigyobge norur iji mothanun

nega do miwosso

Ijen da ijurgoran jikhir sudo obnun

yagsoghago
Norur bonen gioge jaku nan jichyoman ganunde

yeah baby

Dorawajwo morji anhdamyon (anhdamyon)
Ajig narur sarang handamyon (handamyon)
Ajikaji nan gu jarie (jarie) nor gidarigo

isso yeah
Imi darun sarang handamyon (handamyon)
Borsso narur da ijodamyon jogum man (jogum
man)

Do gidarirke do miwoharsu idorog yeah
Cham ore jinaji
Nega tonanji saranghan giogun da
Chombutho obsodon il chorom modu ijosso
Guronde we irohge nunmuri nanunji

Norur mannadon gorin gorumyo to himidungonji
Ijen da ijodago usursudo idan mardo hago

Noui giog hanado obdago midgo jinenunde yeah

baby

Dorawajwo morji anhdamyon (anhdamyon)
Ajig narur sarang handamyon (handamyon)
Ajikaji nan gu jarie (jarie) nor gidarigo

isso yeah
Imi darun sarang handamyon (handamyon)
Borsso narur da ijodamyon jogum man (jogum
man)

Do gidarirke do miwoharsu idorog yeah

(Nonun obnunde) borsso tonanunde
Norur iji mothago niga kog doraorkorago
Negero igo inungor morugoso
Nor da ijoda midonabwa
Nan ajig kuthkaji nor miwomothago guriwo

hanabwa

Hengboghago sarji marajwo narur tonago

himdurojwo
Dashi nege ogo shiphdorog baby baby~

Onjerado nega sengagna hogshi negero

doraorkabwa
Onjena na yojonhi igose nor gidarigo isso

Lyric is in Korean. Dont get confused.... Similiar song from Energ's Mo Nian Mo Yue Mo Yi Tian... This song is nice huh??? Im lovin it!!! ^^

Its raining today.

Go to Jelutong with my sis coz she wants to withdraw money from the bank. She is going out tonight. With her friends to qb... Awww... So jealous... So long I didnt go lepak with my girlfriends... I wanna watch movie!!! Lots of movies!!! The Resident Evil : Extinction, Apartment 1303 and Brothers... I desperately want to go out!!! @_@

I eat Spicy Chicken McDeluxe as my lunch. How come the burger become so spicy??? I just eat it on Tuesday night but not spicy also. Today damn spicy *until my nose become sweaty*. Must be Cass, mulut gagak la. She just say on Tuesday night that how come the spicy mcdeluxe is not spicy at all. Coz I cant take spicy food but I can eat spicy mcdeluxe. Here you go girl. The burger become spicy and I cannot tahan... -_-"

Seems like everyone is not going to training today. Im kinda lazy for training today. So, please excuse my laziness. Lolx!!!

Friendship...

We are friends,

And I do like to pass with you in serious and inconsequential chatter.

I wouldnt mind washing up beside you,

Dusting beside you,

Reading the back half of the paper while you read the front.

We are friends,

And I would miss you,

Do miss you and think of you very often.

Remember we used to go to school together??? Holding hands... Walk the very same road every single day together... " I will follow you, Follow you wherever you will go..."

A friend is someone who understands your past, believes you in the future and accept you just the way you are.

Truly great friend are hard to find, difficult to leave and impossible to forget.

~Friendship Forever~

.:RanNy:.

I know that people will change when they are getting older. But I wish that people around me will change to become a better person from time to time.

Never lies.

Never turn behind friends back.

Never betrayed your dearest friends.

But some people will easily get influence by their surrounding. Once they are nice and sweet. Now they are just full of shit.

Its kinda dissappointed when you find the true colours of our close friends. Its like he/she is turning into another person. "I dont know you anymore...", said her when she know that her close friend is no longer the person she know for 5 yrs.

"Am I the one that had changed or you are the one??? Im really confused with all the things that happened around us recently." The thought coming across to her mind recently. She is confused and cant figure out anything that will give her an answer.

Wan Mei is losing her hairs??!!! Ahahaha!!! Wan Mei, I think you study too hard recently for stpm thats why your hair keep on falling... Here some screenshot about I and Wan Mei chat in msn.

She tell me that she is losing her hair. How??? Of coz go to Yun Nam Hair Care for help. Lolx!!!

I draw that cartoon with 3 hairs coz she is going to look like that after stpm is over... Wakakaka!!

I think she will look yeng with her new 3 hairs hairstyle as she claimed that she is born to be yeng... *uwekkk... puke out my breakfast!!!*

Yay!!! I went to night market today. I thought Im unable to go today as my sis is sick and my mom went to boom cha cha (dancing... duh) but my mom reached home early today at 2200. Then she ask me whether wanna go or not. Of coz I want. We went to buy 3packets of fish crackers *the auntie's fish crackers really nice*, Uncle Bob's chicken *no skins but still taste good* and lastly my favourite Mat Tou Yau's sweet soup *only jelly and longan*. Thats my supper. Burpppp... Opsie... Excuse me #-_-#

What wrong with everything???

Something wrong with my facebook and my blog page.... I cant save any changes Ive made for my blog. Wth!!! So damn fucking annoyed with the error...

I waste my time and blood *im feeding some mosquitoes... scratch scratch... my leg very itchy* to customize my blog psge but it end up like a mess as i cannot save it. ARGHHHH!!!! I wanna punch someone right now....

Raya Party... Indeed...

Watching 'The Brink Of Law' whole afternoon. And today there is new Singaporean's series, 'Switched'. Watch it too. Hehe!!! Seems like I watch tv more than study. Im such a failure.......

Cass called me saying that tonight Nashriq is going to have a raya party at the water sport. Just follow Cass and the rest go... Since there is going to have food. Wei Chuan reach my house first then only Ai Ling. We go to Mcd to meet up with Li Ying as she get sesat when she is following Ai Ling to my house. Hahaha!!!! Funny Li Ying as this is not the first time she come to my house. I wonder how can she sesat. Lo mo nia... Kekez!!!

We reached at the water sport's place quite late around 2130. Bad luck hit on us... Erm... Actually is Ai Ling. She lost her wallet. Its quite weird coz we didnt get off from the car besides my house and Mcd. Ai Ling said that she passed her wallet and hp to Cass when Cass get into her car at Cass's house. Cass is holding her wallet and hp until she reached my house and she get off from the car to call me. Then get off at Mcd to switched place with Wei Chuan as Wei Chuan is going to sit Li Ying's car. When we reached there, Ai Ling's wallet is missing. How??? Why??? When???

Ai Ling, Cass and Wei Chuan went back to Mcd to find the wallet, so I, Ashley and Li Ying going to meet Nashriq at the party. When I was attacking some food, Cass asked me to call her. She told me that Ai Ling had met with an accident. She need us to go to Mcd to search the wallet for her. Wawawawawa..... 3 of us havent even started to sit down and enjoy the food, we have to leave. We found nothing in Mcd. We ask the staff working there but they say no. Then, Cass asked us to go back to the water sport's carpark to search again. But we really found nothing. Even Justin Sensei, Way Loon and Wei Liang helped us to search for it but still dont have. Where did her wallet went missing???

Haizzz... Pity Ai Ling... Her dad is angry with her now... I hope she is okay...

We are soooooooooooooooooo hungry so we went to Mcd to fill our stomach (Ai Ling went back with her dad). We have a chat until 0130. Oh gosh!!! I just realize that I left my house keys in Ai Ling's car. Shit!!!!!!!! I dont have keys to go back. Haizzz.... Have to call my bro to open the door for me.

What a bad day. Everything happen at one time. Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Stupid Cr

Im so pisssed right now... Im going to kick crunhyroll!!! *kick kick kick with all the strength I have* !@#$% Everytime it encounter problem when Im enjoying the series halfway. Hate cr! Fuck cr! Feel like screaming!!!! ARGHHHHH~

Tvb Drama

Men In Pain has finally finish. Today is the last episode. Kinda touching when Ko Fun (Toby) is going to leave HK to New York to futher her studies and Hong Hei (Ron Ng), her husband has give her a future diary. The story so touching. Make me wanna cry. So lam.... Lol!!!

I continue to watch The Drive Of Life. The story has reached to climax where Sau Fung (Charmaine Sheh) call out her wedding with Chun Pong (Raymond Lam) on their wedding day. Wth!!! Chun Pong love her so much and he can give up everything for her. But this stupid childish Sau Fung with her retarted brain wanted to avenge for her mom. SWT!!! Cant she just forget about the past and go with Chun Pong. Its a nice drama. I watch it almost everyday till late night. Ahahaha!!! Coz I cant get over it. Everyone should watch it. Its worth to watch. Hehe.

Damn!!! I was facebook-ing halfway around 0030 suddenly got some brainless people playing firecrackers in the middle of the night. And my dog jump onto my laptop. My laptop nearly fell on the ground. Ohya!! My dog is afraid of thunder, lighting and firecrackers. She is just so coward. She shouldnt be a dog, be a chicken instead. How is she going to catch thieves since she so coward. Jump on my laptop and stuck between the wires and nearly make my laptop fell on the ground. Luckily it didnt fell. Otherwise...

Yesterday grading was suck!!!! No preparation at all. Haizzz. This is what we call it as last minute. Im so dissappointed because I forget about previous newaza and shime. Last night I was having a sucky feeling. Haizzz.

Am I Weak???

Why am I so weak??? I always feel dizzy recently during training. I feel that Im useless. Im dizzy because I didnt take lunch before training. I woke up at 1345 today. So I just take my "breakfast" at 1400. Then go to training at 1645 as Li Ying wants me to become her partner for her grading. I dont feel really good when Yi Jing starts to throw me. I can see lots of "polka dots" and I cant even stand properly. Then when randori time, I dont have the mood to play. I just let them attack me because I dont really feel good. I wanted to stop randori but I think I still can tahan but... I cant... Feel like giving up... And I did... :( When I fight with Ah Wee, I stop halfway. Why I so lousy and weak??? I dont want this to happen everytime. Even if I have taken my lunch and dinner, and also I go to bed early but I always feel dizzy. It is mentally or physically weak??? I dont want this to happen anymore.......

Im Going To Collapse

Rain rain please dont go away... Coz little Ranny want to skip training...

Arghhhh.... It stops raining at 1600. Why?!!! Why dont want to rain until 1845??? So I no need to go training. Now it stops raining, so I have to be kwai kia go training. Reach Msn then I just see only Li Ying and Ah Wee there. No Cass, Ashley and Ai Ling. Shit!!! I shouldnt come at the first place. But I still have Li Ying to accompany. Hehe!!!

T-O-R-T-U-R-E... TORTURE!!!!!! Im so tired. Have to randori for 5 rounds non stop. Do you know that I skipped training for 3days and now I feel exhausted. During randori, suddenly I have a running nose. And Im tired like hell. Cant even breathe with my stupid running nose. My waist pain too. Keep on thrown by all the people. I suck!!!! =P

My mom buy me a huge currypuff with egg inside and no onion, all potatoes!!! Its yummy!!! The currypuff is double the normal size and it cost rm1. Cheap also right??? Next time I should take a picture of it and show to the world.

Stupid crunchyroll. How come it cannot works at night??? I wanna continue to watch The Drive Of Life. Damn!!!! Didnt get to watch pula... Sienz!!!! This afternoon still okay. Its upload so fast. I enjoy watching it and Im addicted to it. Tomorrow you *crunchyroll* work proprely and smoothly like yesterday.

The Guy, The Girl And This Girl

Here's a thing...

The girl has been betrayed the guy before. But the guy is like so "faithful", saying that he will wait for his girl no matter what. One day, the girl decide to go back with the guy and suprisingly the guy has rejected the girl. Suddenly the guy wanted to go back with the girl. Both of them are back together again and they look really lovely together. The truth is the guy has cheated on the girl. The girl suspected the guy long long ago and one day *thank god!!!*. The girl discovered the truth about the guy cheat on her. The guy having a secret affair with another girl *lets call the another girl as this girl*. It started when the guy is upset when the girl leaves him so he comfront himself with this girl. Finally both of them fall for each other. Im not sure their are together or just fall for each other but didnt get together. So, during the period of time, the guy and this girl are still email, sms and call each other eventhough this guy already get back with his gf. Through an email from the guy to this girl saying that their relationship should end here but the guy says that he still love this girl. So, the girl finds out the email and have a fight with the guy.

Confession has been revealed...

The guy says that his realationship wit this girl is all fake coz he wanna catch the girl attend and wanting to make her jealous and go back to him. But the fake realtionship turn out to be real. The guy and this girl still contact with each other until now. Their email and sms are kinda of intimate that doesnt sound like normal friends smsing each other. But the guy ends up to choose back the girl.... Erm... Its so confusing coz he like the girl but he say that he still love this girl. WTF!!!! The story makes me blur... and I think everyone is blur too... Its complicated!!!

Aiyooo..... I think I cannot continue this blog coz Im starts to blur and I dont know what should I write next.... SWT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blue or Brown??? Blue For Me!!!

Yesterday I ponteng training... Haha!!! Coz I dont feel like going. Then I saw Cass online and she ask me to call her in msn. Aiya... Her msn ting tong coz her msn will dc once she call people. Then she tell me that Sensei Seng Poh is angry with us coz didnt go for training today. The most important thing is he dun like us keep on postpone our grading. Actually Yi Jing called me on thursday night that ksp (Sensei Seng Poh) dragged him to have a talk after training *which I ponteng too* Ksp tell him that we suka suka postpone our (me and Cass) grading like we are the boss. I was like WTF!!!! He is the one that make us postponed our grading and now he wanna blame us.

1. Justin think that we are not ready yet for our training so he postponed it to next saturday. The actual day is suppose to be monday. Im okay with that.
2. On the saturday when I arrive at the clubhouse, I saw Justin is going out and I ask Yi Jing where is sir going. I thought today we suppose to have grading. Yi Jing told me that sir is going to some religious talk. So, I think our grading is going to postponed again to next saturday.
3. That saturday I ponteng training eventhough I know we have grading. Then Cass postponed our grading to monday.
4. Monday I and Cass went early to msn to practice our grading. Suddenly ksp merajuk with all of us coz we didnt rei him. He leave the class without saying any words. All of us was like OO We're in trouble. We apologize to him but he dont want to accept. Seems like we are going to postponed our training to tuesday.
5. Tuesday... everyone of us that going for grading went to training. And he didnt come to the class. After training 4 of us; me, Cass, Ai Ling and Yi Jing went to call him. Again, he is ignoring us. Pretend to be not inside the house. Everyone of us are not really happy coz of his siu hei attitude and then we leave.

So, I dont think is our fault. We have done nothing wrong. Now, I and Cass decide not to go for grading anymore until we feel that we are ready for it. So what if Im still a blue belt. Brown belt doesnt make me win or feel im getting better. Whatever!!!! Su Pei and Sin Yen are brown. I dont mind. If im blue and I still can beat a brown belt that will be even nice. I bother about the fucking belt ranking.

Mars Vs Venus

Just finish watching this Singapore's drama, Mars Vs Venus. Now showing in Astro Shuang Xing. But I cannot wait so I watch it online. Haha!!! Today rain... So bored... My sis go for steamboat with friends. So nice!!! The steamboat is better than Golden steamboat. Coz they have Haagen Daaz ice cream. And the great part is you can eat as many scoop as you want. Haha!!! Great right?!! I wanna ajak Boon Gin and Ai Ling to go with me.

5th Times Of Postpone

Yea. This is the 5th time we postpone our grading. I dont know what the hell happen to Sensei Seng Poh. He still merajuk today. We finish training then went to call him coz we wanted to start our grading now. But he ignore us. We call him lots of times but he didnt come out from his house. Arrgghhhh!!!! Waste our time to wait him. Now I dont care whether we are going to grade or whatever. No brown just stuck in blue lo... I dont care anymore. Wanna grade somemore have to pujuk pujuk him. Sien!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sensei Is Mad At Us

Today we suppose to have our grading but Sensei Seng Poh is angry with us because we didnt rei with him. Its a second time this year. He and Nashriq come late for the training. So, we start our warm up own selves. When he reach, he is waiting for us to finish our warm up and everything. When we are playing knee hitting, he is standing at the corner *you know, he is waiting for us to stop to rei him*. Unfortunately we forgot to rei him. Suddenly he is mad and get out from the dojo and sit on the bench outside dojo. Wei Chuan go to pujuk pujuk him but suddenly he come in and take off his belt, change back to his shirt and go out. * I thought he already feel ok so he come in to teach us but manatau la he is still angry with us.

All of us stop our training and go out to apologise with him. I dont know why he so siu hei wan. All of us say sorry lots of times to him but he dont want to accept it. He says: this is not the first time you all didnt rei with me. What if other state coaches come and we did this to him??? He tak ada air muka. And he talk "nag" a lot. Nashriq ask us to go in and continue our training.

Seems like no grading today. Well, this is the 4th times our grading has been postponed. It postpone to tomorrow. Hopefully, tomorrow he feel better. Otherwise.... *slit my throat*

The Sims

Im addcited to The Sims recently. Its kind of fun that we can control them. Im turning them into lesbian and gay. Also a guy married with 2 women and stay together. Lolx!!!! This is nice *evil smile* I enjoy playing it until every night I slept at 0600. Actually I plan to stay awake for the whole night until tomorrow morning. But I scared that my mom will scold or nag at me. Haizzz!!!